The Human Experience of Mary & Martha

In today's episode, we will discuss the attribute and qualities of Mary and Martha as they navigate the human experience of loss and gift. God's love is never too far from us in our times of pain. God is present in good and bad times. He just wants us to sit with Him.

💖Highlights💖

-  Learn to be still with God

- Allow yourself to feel the experience of being human

- God is always present in our time of need

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Transcript

The Human Experience of Mary & Martha

Betty
Hello Queens. Welcome to the SheSpeaks Love Women of the Bible series. We're so excited to share these incredible women of the Bible and highlight their personal story and their legacy. These podcasts will encourage, inspire, and share wisdom from God's word as it relates to women and our unique circumstances.

Let's get into their phenomenal story and the power of their voice. Today's woman of the Bible is Mary and Martha, presented by Queen Ikikima

Ikikima

and today I'm going to be speaking about Mary and Martha. Now, I went back and forth a lot with this story because, At first, I was just gonna tell it the way I knew it.

I was just gonna focus on just one specific Bible story. But just the more I kind of looked into it, I was like, okay, maybe I should focus more on Martha. And then the deeper I mistakenly fell into it. I was like, you know what? It needs to be both. Mary and Martha. So just to add to the backstory of this Jesus finally decided to give me this message on Sunday.

So on Sunday nights before I went to bed, after weeks and weeks of asking him, because Ms. Betty very graciously told me, gave me a lot of time to prepare, and I was like, whoa, I'm gonna have this down. I'm gonna know, I'm gonna need notes, you know. But you know, Jesus does what he wants. We love that about him.

So I finally have something to say to you. It may come out as my notes are written. It may not. Just all depends on Jesus and I would like it to depend on him. So yeah, gonna, that's the whole backstory. So, okay. I'm speaking about Mary and Martha, so I'm gonna go ahead. A lot of you may know Mary and Martha just from.

The introduction story of them in the Bible where Jesus stopped by their house, right? Some of you might know them as Lazarus as sisters Lazarus, who was raised from the dead. I wanna tell you a bit about how I knew them before God gave me these notes. basically, one I knew of them was just from that introduction story in the Bible that you find in Luke 10 chapter.

Luke chapter 10, verses 38 to 42. So I'm gonna read the New Living Translation. As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed Jesus into her home. Her sister Mary sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he taught, but Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing.

She came to Jesus and said, Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the. Tell her to come and help me. But the Lord said to her, my dear Martha, you're worried and upset over all these details. There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.

So what I gleaned from this story and a little bit about just what I've been taught over the years, my understanding, oh, you want the scripture again? It's Luke chapter 10 verses 38 to 40. Yeah. So my understanding of this story always was, yeah, thanks, Nadia always was okay. Mary did the right thing.

Mary said you know, Mary went, and when Jesus came into the house, she was like, oh, it's Jesus. I need to be close to him. And when it sat his feet and Martha did the wrong thing, why was Martha running around? She should have been in his feet too, right? Be like Martha, don't be like Mary. Don't be like.

That's always been my understanding. Right? And that was really the message I thought I was gonna bring to you, basically, you know? But then I was like, let me just take a deeper, deeper look into who I was, like who Martha is. Cause the story can't be that simple. Just, she just does nonsense. Don't be like Martha, be like Mary.

I was like, let me take a look into who Martha is. And I was, I started looking into who Mary was too. Cuz I was like, okay. Even though Mary, that I would say, oh, be like Mary, who is. Yeah, she said it. She got it. She seemed to get it right that one time, but who is she really? So I started looking into who Mary is and you can find a little more about who she is.

I feel like you get a, a better idea of the character in John chapter 12. So I'm gonna read that starting from verse one, and I'm gonna stop at verse eight. So John, chapter 12, verses one to eight. Then six days before the Passover, Jesus came to Bethany, where Lazarus was who had been dead, Let me read that again.

Then six days before the Passover, Jesus came to Bethany, where Lazarus was who had been dead, Jesus raised from the dead There they made him a supper. They made Jesus a supper and Martha served. But Jesus, who was one of those who sat at the table with him. And Mary took, wait, lemme see, but La sorry.

Lazarus was one of those who sat at the table with Jesus and Mary took a pound of very costly oil of Spikenard, anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped his feet with her hair, and the house was filled with the fragrance of the oil. One second, a little bit of lip, mom,

let me see. But one of his disciples, Judas Kat Simon's son, would betray him. Why was this fra fragrant oil not sold for 300 dery and given to the poor then? Then he said not oh this. He said, not that he cared for the poor, but because he was a thief and had the money bots, and he used to take what was put in it.

But Jesus said, let her alone, leave her alone. She's kept this for the day of my burial for the poor you have with you always, but me. You do not have always. So at first I just thought, okay, well this story just further proves, you know, we go back to that intro story, be like, Barry, don't be like Martha.

Look at Martha. The time they mentioned Martha,, in this passage was in ch verse two where it said there they made him, they made Jesus suffer and Martha served. I was like, oh, there she is with the serving again and miss it out on hanging out with Jesus, right? And where is Mary doing the right thing?

You know, she's doing this thing with the oil and she's just where she needs to be, be like, So I wanted to look a little deeper to understand, okay. Mary was, Mary, put this oil on Jesus' feet. Okay. That's very nice. You know? But I was like, okay. I asked a question just randomly, just outta to your personal curiosity.

I wasn't gonna put this in the message, but this question ended up helping me to understand Mary even more. The question I asked is, what is Biard? Cause? It said she, she used this cost, the oil of Spikenard. So I wanna read what I found about what Spikenard is. Spikenard is a plant that grows in the Himalayas, the mountain range of Nepal, China, and India.

It was used as an incest incense offered by the Hebrews in the Jerusalem, Jerusalem. In Old Testament times, punch of perfumes and oils were used to prepare a body for burial, which is why the act of anointing Jesus' head with spike art prior to his crucifixion was highly symbolic. So going back, the fact that Mary chose spike art, knowing.

Because in that time they used it to prepare people for burials. And Jesus even said, she has kept this for the day of my burial. Mary knew something that even the disciples were shaky on. She knew that Jesus was going to die. How does she know that? Cause Jesus was always telling everybody, right? Jesus didn't keep it a secret.

It was his disciples. He used to go, no, you're not gonna die. You know, it was a Simon, right? That did that said that He was like, I would be sadan. So even his disciples struggled with believing that, but. She believed it. She prepared for it. So that means she believed what came out of Jesus's mouth to believe what he, what came out of his mouth.

That means he also believed he was who he said he was. He she believed that he was the son of God. So another thing that I realized about Mary in this passage was actually revealed through Juda Chariot when Judas Chariot. Why was this fragrant oil not sold for 300 dery and given to the poor? So dery, that currency back then they used to give one dary for a day's wage, so 300.

was 300 days worth of money. So if it's 300 days worth, I mean, it's almost a year. So that's an annual wage. If we translate that into, nowadays, let's say you have a decent office job, you're doing okay, you're not super rich, but you're comfortable. That's at least what, five digits perfume. That was five digits.

That's what she used on the on Jesus' feet. So she knew his. We don't know whether she bought it specifically for that or whether she already had, it doesn't matter in the, in the end, you know how much it costs, right? And it's like, yeah, she could have done what Judas said, but she used it on Jesus', feet as feet, the dirtiest part of your body, right?

Especially for them there, you're walking around barefoot, knew his worth. This perfume worth an annual wage was nothing in comparison to the dirt on Jesus'. Those are two huge things I feel like I learned from, from John 12 about who Mary was. Mary knew who Jesus was. She believed what he said. She believed in him.

This was a believer, this was a Christian, this was a, a converted child of God. She'd given her life to this is to, to me, that was the proof and she wasn't just, It wasn't just a Christian, it was like someone who just, okay, I just do this. Cause, you know, a ceremony of being religious, like to give what may have been the most expensive thing in your house and using on his feet.

She, she knew who he was. And that says to me, that says a lot about Mary. So once again, it goes back to that argument. Oh, wow. Even more so be like, Mary Martha, what does Wetta do? All she knows how to do is serve, throw Martha away. Right? But I was like, okay, I, I, I learned a little bit more about Mar Mary.

Okay. Okay, but who's Martha? So I was like, I just wanted to find more on her. So I looked at the story of, you know, the, everybody probably knows the story of when Lazarus died and was raised from the dead, right? Like everybody probably knows Lazarus, the brother more than you know, his sisters Mary and Martha, right?

Second. So I went to the story of Lazarus just to see, cuz I was like, oh, I'm pretty sure they mentioned his sisters there. So let's see what they were doing, you know? So that took me to John, chapter 11. Where was I? Yeah, John, chapter 11. I started from verse, I'm gonna read from verse one to. Now a certain man was sick, Lazarus of Bethany, and Bethany is the town of Martha and her sister Mary.

It was that Mary who anointed the Lord with fragrant oil and wiped his feet with her hair, whose brother was sick. Therefore, the sister sent to him, sent to Jesus saying, Lord behold, he whom you love is sick because Jesus was your friends with la. So I'm gonna jump to, in in John 11, I'm gonna jump to verses 17 to 27, because basically what happens after verses one to three is, you know, Jesus Jesus finds out last verse is sick.

He stays where he is for two more days, you know, and then finally he says to go to where Lazarus is, knowing that, and he says it to the disciples that, yeah, Lazarus is sleeping. And they're like, well, he's sleeping. It's gonna be fine. And he's like, no. He died, you know? So he knew Lazarus had died, then went after two days.

So this is when he finally went to where Lazarus is. This is verse 17. So when Jesus came, he found that he had already been in the tomb four days. Lazarus had already been in the tomb. Now, Bethany was near Jerusalem about two miles away, and many of the Jews had joined the women around Martha and Mary to comfort them concerning their brother.

Then Martha. Martha, right? Not. And Martha, as soon as she heard that Jesus was coming, went and met him, but Mary was sitting in the house. Now, Martha said to Jesus, Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. But even now I know that whatever you ask of God, God will give you. Jesus said to her, your brother will rise.

Martha said to him, I know that he will rise again in the resurrection. At the last day, Jesus said to her, I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me, though he may die, he shall live, and whoever lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this? She said to him, yes, Lord, I believe that you are the Christ, the son of God who is to come into this world.

That was Martha, not Mary. So we've already established Mary. Mary believes she knows who. Nobody has to tell her she know. Barely. So did Martha. My favorite part of this, this Bible passage was when she first came out and she said to Jesus, Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. So she knows that Jesus had the power to keep him alive.

But then she goes further and says, but even now I know that whatever you ask of God, God will give. That's faith that goes beyond, it goes beyond. Let's just say it like that, right? Because that goes beyond the man. God could have just prayed over him who he was sick and he would've felt better. This is okay, like even though this, without saying it her, but even now I know that whatever you ask God will give you.

She's implying if you ask for Lazarus to come back to la How many examples do you think she probably had? Just seeing Jesus raise people from the dead. She, she may not have, you know, had that many. There are people who, that you still see a miracle, but that doesn't mean you're gonna believe it's gonna work for you.

So that's her faith went out pretty for. This is a woman who, once again, another woman who knows God, she knows who he is. Nobody had to tell her. So both Mary and Martha were serious about Jesus, and they had good, strong relationships. Did I know that before I read their introduction story? Nope. . Do a lot of people know that, but maybe not.

I don't hear that much, to be honest. So now we know a lot more about them, right? We know that both Mary and Martha, they knew who Jesus was. They believed that he was who he said he was. They believed that he was gonna die and come back. They believed. Right, which is such a big deal in that day and age because you know, we've got a good, we have the Holy Spirit.

You know, they didn't have the Holy Spirit like that. Just talking to them all the time, being like, Hey, hey, don't do that. Don't do that. You know, they didn't have that . So for them to believe and that, that's very amazing to me, you know? So now that we have kind of a background of both Mary and Martha, let's go back to that introduction.

I wanna read it again. So that's Luke 10, verses 38 to 42. And Jesus in the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem. They came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed Jesus into her home. Her sister Mary sat at the Lord's feet. Listen to what he, and listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing.

She came to Jesus and. Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work, tell her to come and help me? But the Lord said to her, my dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details. There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it and it will not be taken away from her.

In the new King James version, the way Jesus says that part of Mary has discovered that one thing worth being concerned about the way it says it is, Mary has chosen that good. In the NIV version, he says, Mary has chosen what is better. So we can look at this like, yeah, be like Mary, don't be like Martha.

But if you really pay attention to what Jesus was saying to her, you may, you might notice that he's not reprimanding her the way you might think. He wasn't saying what she did was wrong. Like if you look at the i v version, Mary has chosen what is. So we didn't say what Martha is doing is even bad. What was she doing?

She was preparing a big dinner. I can imagine them seeing Jesus coming down the road and thinking, Jesus, come to our house. Oh, Jesus is in the house. Like both Mary and Martha. That same thought, beginning thought and Mary thinking, I just wanna be close to him. And Martha thinking, what can I give him? What can I do for him?

Or either those thoughts bad, like they're both pretty good, pretty good ways to see it. But in that moment, Jesus's re, his reprimand wasn't. Martha, you did the bad thing. His reprimand was targeting Martha's focus. What was she focused on in that moment that she wasn't? There's nothing wrong with preparing a dinner, but the way you said the thing, you were worried and upset over all these details.

There is only one thing worth being concerned about as Jesus was in your house. You had him there physically in your house and he's not, you know, what does he say? I wait, no, I'm mixing up. I'm mixing up Bible person that he was saying he's not gonna be with them forever. It's a limited period of time you can cook food for him.

That's not a problem, but like you're like, oh my sister, she's not doing the right thing, blah, blah, blah. But it's, and there's nothing that was nothing bad about what Martha was doing. It was just her focus. Where was her focus? She was so busy in the doing that she was missing who she was in the presence.

And it makes me wonder how often we do that, cuz I've done that a lot. I've done that most especially with serving in church. And God had to sit me down when I did. Like I cried that didn't want to be sat down. I was enjoying it and I thought, this is how I communicate with you. But he's like, you're so busy doing it, you're forgetting I'm there.

So it's so weird. You can be in the middle of doing stuff for God and God's like, Hey hey, come and sit here. Like, Hey Jesus, wait for a moment. Let me finish doing this thing for. You know, so I feel like that's probably more along the lines of where Martha was. It's not like she was doing anything bad.

She was serving, Martha was always serving . Martha was clearly a servant. You know, she, she seemed to love to serve. That seemed to be her way to give love. So there's nothing wrong with that. But no matter what your personality is, I feel like God still demands that you sit with him sometimes. You know, it's not gonna be sta silent still all the time, just being realistic cuz life has to keep going, you know?

But I still think that he does demand those moments, those still moments with him. I remember it was a few months, it was in April. I did this competition. I was I got this Sing one of my songs in front of an audience. My favorite moment in the competition wasn't a, oh, I won, or, oh, you know, anything like that.

I had this moment that I go back to a lot, that brings me a lot of peace where it was my turn to go on. So I was standing backstage, but they had like, kind of like double curtains. I don't know how to explain it. I was at the side of the stage and I could just see all, I could see ahead. I couldn't see the audience cause I wasn't far out enough.

So all I could see was just the stage and the lights on the stage and it was just like empty stage, an empty stripper stage in front of me. Right. And just the, where I was standing, I couldn't see the people backstage either. So it felt like I was just isolated for a moment, which was such a strange thing and such a busy atmosphere.

And I just felt like I just had this lit, probably a minute or less, like a minute or a little over of just. Me the stage, the lights and just the curtains. I don't know how to explain it. Just felt very isolated in a public place and all I heard was, I can't remember his exact words, but Jesus was like, all right, you ready to do this?

Okay, we are about to do this. And it just, I don't know what it was, but that, even when I think about it now, like I just, cuz it just felt so personal. I loved the moment of actually getting out there onstage and singing and playing song and everything. That was a lot of fun. But that moment, Just being there in silence with just me.

It felt like only me and God existed. There's no place more certain for me. There's no place where I feel more sure, more confident, more centered, more myself. And the only time I get moments like that apart from that one time, which that was the first time it had ever happened in public, is when I sit still with God, I make myself sit.

You know, and that can be, that's something that's become a lot harder for me to do as I've gotten older, you know? But, It's something I still make myself do because it, it's, it centers you, it helps you. It's not, it's not just because like number one, God does wanna spend time with you, but you also need it.

You need that. Like, I know I keep doing like this. I feel like, see this means centered , but you need that stillness. You need that, Hey, sit for a moment. And I really think that's what he was trying to get Martha to do in that moment. I don't. It is a reprimand. You know, I don't see it like Martha, don't be like Martha, everybody.

I don't see it like that. You know? So that, just looking at who both of them were, Mary and Martha, it was easier to stop saying, don't be like Martha. Cuz it's not that simple of a, the story can't be summed up as so simple of a sentence and don't be like Martha. It's that sometimes we have times like Martha sometimes we're, we're where Martha in that that moment in her life.

We're trying to keep life from falling apart. Sometimes it's not even that you're, you're running around just for the sake of running around. It's that you have kids, it's that there's a life, it's that there's a job. It's that there, there's so much stuff going. It can be hard to even remember to slow down, but I feel like that was Jesus's reminder.

So that story, I don't see it as simple as, don't be like Martha, because if it was that simple, then we could go to the story of Lazarus. Lazarus dying and being raised up, and we could say, don't be like Mary because I, I didn't read this part, but I'm gonna repeat. John 11, verse 20. This is when Jesus came and Lazarus had died.

Then Martha, as soon as she heard that Jesus was coming, went and met him when Mary was sitting in the house jumping ahead to verses 28 to 32. And when Martha had said these things, this was right after Martha had had that conversation with Jesus, where we're like, oh, okay. She really knows God. And when Martha had said these things, she went her way and secretly called Mary her sister, saying The teacher has come and is calling for you.

As soon as Mary heard that, she arose quickly and came to Jesus. Now, Jesus had not yet come into the town, but was in the place where Martha met him. Then the Jews who. With Mary in the house and comforting her. When they saw that Mary Rose up quickly and went out, they followed her saying she's going to the tomb to weep there.

So like verse 32. Then when Mary came where Jesus was and saw him, she fell down on his feet saying to him, Lord, if you had been here, our brother would not have died. So she ended up saying the same thing Martha did. So she still believed the same thing Martha did, but at that moment, when Jesus first came, she didn't.

Could be a number of reasons. First off, grief, right? Real thing. Let's be real. In that moment, do you really feel like thinking about anything? Do you feel like responding to anything? Do you feel like if you're just sitting there stunned, that's that's a normal reaction. You know, it, it's easy to look from the outside on the story and go do the same thing we did for their introduction story and, and flip the switch and go, don't be like Mary in the story.

Be like, Martha, look how strong Martha was. Even though her brother died, she jumped up to the Lord and all right, one thing that I've learned, or the, one of the biggest things I've learned by looking deeper into who Mary and Martha are is that I don't care how close you are to, to Jesus, you're still human.

But at the same time, even within that humanity, God still provides the grace for you to be close to him, right? Like what is that verse? Oh, I wrote it. Zacharia four, six. The one that, the part that says not by my might nor by power, not by my nor by power, but by my spirits as the Lord of hopes, right?

Even having a relationship with God. Takes the grace of God . You know, there are those moments being a human being, not every single moment of your life, no matter how close you're to God, is gonna look super holy. Sometimes it's gonna be messy. Sometimes you're gonna be sad. Sometimes you're gonna get angry with God himself.

And sometimes even though, you know, being angry with God is not the way, sometimes you still have to fight off big, angry with God, , you know, like they're the different things. Come up just because you're a human being. And what I love the most about both Mary and Martha, both of these sisters, is that they had strong relationships with Jesus because for them to believe what they believed at that time, in that day and age, without the Holy Spirit being present, you can't tell me they didn't know God.

You can't tell me that. But at the same time, we get these glimpses of their humanity. And I, I I love that. I love that that was included in the Bible. That part wasn't hidden . It was all put there. Because if you wanna look for role models, people to look up to, I don't know about you, but I need to know, I, I, you know, I've grown out of that thing of just wanting to look up to someone who, they just look perfect all the time.

You know, I need to know you cry. I need to know that you bleed. And that's what I feel like Mary and Martha showed us. You can get distracted like Martha did in the the story where she was busy preparing dinner, she's preparing a meal for Jesus. That probably tasted really amazing, right? . But in the process of being in the kitchen all the time, you're not in the presence.

You know? Or we could look at Mary, who it's like, man, Mary, she was really so, Like, and it just, it feels so dumb to say it like that. Like, ugh, Mary, she wasn't paying attention to Jesus. It's like, excuse me, her brother died. Can we talk about it? You know, so, and I feel like it's just parts like that. Not to go on a rant, I'm not gonna follow, get on a soapbox, but just, I think it's very important to have empathy.

I think it's very, I. To, to, you know, as they say, walk a mile in someone else's shoes. Try to understand from that, from people's point of view. It's easy from the outside even looking. Cause you know, you look at the Bible and it's like, you gotta remember these were people, this is our history. This is the, the Bible is the history of the beginning of God's relationship with humanity.

So this is history. These were people who lived for, So it's very important to look at these people, like people not go, oh, why couldn't you have been more like Debora in this story? Or, or Mary over here? Or, but it's like you didn't see, we may not have seen all those people's human moments, but that doesn't mean they, they weren't there.

That you being human doesn't make you any less of a really good Christian. You being human doesn't make you any less of a lover of God. One thing I was gonna say was it's kind of interesting because you can, how was I gonna say this? The wonderful thing about being human is that God constantly is looking at your heart constantly.

So when you fail, when you mess up sometimes, God doesn't always process it the way you do where you think, oh, we gotta start from the beginning. Oh, I messed. He doesn't process it the way you do. He's actually always more concerned with how you're gonna get up and keep going because he's always looking at your heart.

Does your heart say, oh, I love Jesus. Do you sincerely from your heart wanna please Jesus? If the answer to both those questions are yes, I can promise you you're gonna be alright. You're gonna be alright with Jesus. He's always patient with us. I think the issue is we're not always patient with ourselves.

And that's something I really, that I learned from this Mayor Martha story that I wanna say to everybody here. Cut yourself some slack. Cut yourself some slack. I know that we shouldn't lean to the other extreme of just like, oh, well I'm a human so you know, I sin sometimes, you know, I know we shouldn't lean over to that other side.

And I feel like we do talk a lot about that other extreme, but let's also talk about this extreme over here, the opposite side. Have some mercy on yourself. I feel like Jesus has so much more mercy on us than we do on ourselves. And we may think we're judging ourselves the way God is judging us, but, hmm, he's looking at hearts, and that's something like, that's something God's been teaching me how to do, to look inward and actually ask myself, what were my real intentions?

What is my heart really? Even if I'm in a situation where I mess up, I fail, I hurt. Sometimes I do have to do that introspective look to see, okay, how deep is the problem really? Is it that man I just really missed, I just said something stupid and I need to come and apologize cuz I wasn't thinking. Or is it No, you actually are holding something deep against this person in your heart.

You know what I mean? Like I feel like we really need to look. We need to judge ourselves from the source. What is your heart really saying? You know, it's easy to just slip up and go, I slip so I suck. You know, I slip so I'm not good, you know, but it's like, is it really that simple? Just like I said about Mary and Martha, we were like, oh, be like Martha.

No. Be like, is is the story really that simple? And my belief is, no, it's not gonna be simple. It's gonna be a little complicated. It's gonna be, it's gonna have a lot in it because we're dealing with humans. So I just want you to keep that in mind about yourself. Like just if you can glean that from the story of Marion Martha.

Just like, just this thought of, wow, these women really knew God. Let's say it like, wow, these women were human beings who really knew God, and then begin to say that about yourself. I'm a human being who really loves. And really wants to please God, and I just am gonna be patient on myself as long as that mission me please.

I want to please God. As long as that doesn't change, I'm just gonna continue to believe I'm okay. I'm okay, , I'm okay. So that's, that's kind of where I wanna end. I just wanna tell you, you're, you're okay. You're okay. You, you, ma you're not as bad off as you think. That's, that may not be for everybody. That might be for one person, but I hope every everybody was able to get something out of that.

So that's all Queens.

Betty

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